Aunt Pat

Patsy Doughty Cross was born on January 24, 1942 in Lufkin, Texas to John Richard Doughty and Wynon Towery Doughty. She married Paul Cross on November 4, 1960 in Houston, Texas. They had one child Laney Cross who currently resides in Texas.

Aunt Pat went to meet her maker on December 1, 2010 at the age of 68.

I met Aunt Pat in 2001. Besides my older sister she was the closest link to my father Roy Douglas Doughty. He died in 1975 when I was 6-months-old.

Aunt Pat was the first person who could provide me with photos of my late father. I was 27 and literally dying to see a picture of my biological father. I was so thankful to hear all of her wonderful memories about her one and only older brother.

Soon after meeting Aunt Pat we went on the Debra Duncan show in Houston to meet my three half-sisters and their children. Pat provided me with so many priceless family photos, poems and other family keepsakes.

Aunt Pat was the first family member to question my sexuality and yet assure me it was okay to be gay. The jury is still out, I'm just a single guy looking for the right one. Being a sexual abuse survivor can complicate that area of my life, that's why I don't believe it's important to "come out".

While sex abuse is the worst stone that can hit a person, I've discovered there is healing and there is recovery. Thanks to Aunt Pat my mind is more at rest when it comes to that part of my life. Either way, I am whole.

She once told me a story about my father "rolling a homo" one night at a bar. He deeply regretted his actions and knew what he had done was wrong. If reparations by a son for his father are possible I'm making them now.

Aunt Pat went on to say if my father were alive he'd support me too and be so very proud.

I have struggled with my weight and sexuality and it wasn't always easy being biracial. I was teased throughout school and bullies still enjoy those three exciting things about me, but I wouldn't change a thing. We need more folks like Aunt Pat in this world to let us know it's okay to live and let live.

At 35, if I only have 33 more years to live, I want to live like Aunt Pat. I want to be the person who questions whether or not you're happy and then I want to suggest you 'just be yourself'.

QuotesDoughty 35